The Truth About Having Kids in Your 30’s

She clearly had her children while she was in her 20s. Photo: Canva

“So how are you feeling?”

It had been two weeks since I’d started medication for my newly diagnosed condition, and my psychiatrist asked me this question as I plopped down in the horse-print embroidered chair in front of his desk.

“I’m feeling better, but I’m sad. My son turned 18 yesterday.”

“So what is that feeling?” he asked me. Um, sadness, doc.

“I’m sad. He’s not a baby anymore. He’s an adult.”

“But what is that?” he replied. He’s a lovely man but not a native English speaker, so he’s sometimes difficult to understand. I clearly didn’t understand what he was asking me.

“I’m sad!” I exasperatedly repeated.

He laughed and bent over his desk so his face was closer to mine. “But what is that called?” he said.

I just stared at him, my mouth curled and face contorted in an “I don’t know what the fuck you want me to tell you” expression.

He finally spoke: “It’s Grief”.

Grief.

That’s exactly what it was. I was grieving.

Get married, they said. Have kids, they said.

I had my first son when I was 31. I had been married for five years, and…