14 Things You MUST Do Before Having Kids

Michelle Detwiler
4 min readSep 22, 2024
Remember when you could watch the sunset without kids?

Kids are great; they’re fun, they make you smile, they make silly noises and smear food on their clothes. Yet for all the joy children can bring us, there are times when even the best parent wishes she could have some “Me” time.

And for those of you who have not yet become parents, I conducted a very unscientific poll of my friends, and they said these are the 14 things you must do before you commit to the single greatest responsibility you will ever have:

14. Have all of the sex

It doesn’t necessarily have to be with lots of different people. Just have it. A lot. Because once you have children, you will either be too tired, too stressed out, or never alone enough to do it.

13. Go to every movie that is released

See horror movies, comedies, dramas, documentaries, even animated ones. Pay the full ticket price, get popcorn. When you have kids, you can’t take them to movie theatres — not that you’d want to — and you will never be able to watch a rental or something on Netflix until after they go to bed. And by then, you’ll be too tired.

12. Visit Europe

…Or go on the African Safari, or drive to Montana — whatever thing you’ve “always wanted to do”. When the kids are born…

--

--